Ask and Ye Shall Recieve
I was having a wonderful birthday lunch last week. It was magnificent Thai food at a restaurant new to me. I had received two delightful books as presents and thought it could not get any better than this when my friend began sharing some of her upcoming projects and ideas. I had resources that could help and she asked for the information. SHE ASKED!!!!
I left with five requests. At the time I did not realize the value of this gift, but I did notice a new pep in my step as I headed home. I chalked it up to an Asian noodle high and simply the effect that time with this friend creates.
Of course, I had not written down the requests, trusting that my memory would serve me as it always has. I must admit that three I remembered immediately but had to really spin the Roladex of my mind for the other two. Luckily, I employed my new approach which is to not pay attention to what they were, simply note that I “owed” her two more pieces of information and await their floating again to the surface. I did note that perhaps I had reached a point where making a notation could be a better strategy, but the system did not fail me.
It was nearly 24 hours before the last two inquiries burst onto the scene, but there they were, and I quickly shot off text messages with the 411 as they say. My friend sweetly wrote back that she was sorry to have ask for so many things and that was when it hit me in the face. SHE ASKED!!
As the recovering co-dependent, I have been doing the mindful practice of waiting to be asked rather than my previous mindless approach of wading in to rescue with no request or reason. I was so impressed with myself that I had not flung myself in her general direction but could still here the “cry for help” when it came. I had been worried that I would miss the cues if I was not hyper-vigilant and three steps ahead, but it is not true. None of her requests were earth-shattering or life and death, but I could help. I could HELP without being a nosy Parker. I could HELP because someone needed my information. I could HELP because someone needed what I had.
I could HELP!! So now it was the happiest of birthdays.
